Inside This Issue
- Smooth Sailing?
- What Our Clients Are Saying
- In The News
- Team Time
- There is 'Me' in Teams!
- Bury the Hatchet
- Birthdays Are For Everyone!
- CEO Corner: "Tipping Point"
- Ask The Experts
- Featured Service: L.E.A.R.N. as a Team
Smooth Sailing?
When a new team is formed, there is usually a fair amount of anxiety from members. Team function falls into three phases:
Fight. In the beginning, there can be an abundance of disagreements. People usually have different purposes and suggested solutions, thus leading to conflict. Most team members experience tremendous stress. Extroverts blow up and introverts puff up. The result is not a pleasant sight.
If this happens to your team, hang in there. This is normal human behavior. Sometimes it is helpful to know that dysfunction is a normal process before things can get better. It can also aid the team if this is discussed before any disagreements arise.
Flight. After the fight comes the desire to quit the team. Many team members are convinced they are on the wrong team, or that some members need to leave if they are to stay. If they do not have the option of physically leaving, they become mentally or emotionally absent. This way, it is not their fault for the mistakes that the team is making.
When the team becomes so uncomfortable that you consider it not worth your time, realize that this, too, is a normal phase in the life of a team. Stay the course and stay engaged. Ask open questions to strive to understand your team members' points of view. It is not necessary to agree with everything. It is necessary to agree to listen and to keep an open mind.
Unite. The third phase of team life is rewarding. Team members begin to recognize the value of each other and even the value of those quite different than themselves. This is the phase when the majority of the work product is accomplished.
Many experts believe that the unite phase is not possible without the fight and flight. A team needs to experience some trial and tribulation in order to come together. Some would say that the diamond would still be a lump of coal without the pressure.
At TLC, we believe that understanding people and how they interact in teams can help to increase the effectiveness and satisfaction of being a team member. Here are some quick tips to help you with your next team:
- Listen thoroughly.
- Take notes.
- Ask questions.
- Refrain from reaching a judgement too quickly.
- Turn your initial statements into questions to gently steer the conversation.
- Follow through with commitments.
- Be prepared for each team meeting.
- Arrive on time.
- Stay on track.
- Remind each other what the team's goals are.
- Be positive.
- Refrain from taking comments personally.
- Choose your words carefully.
Strive to see yourself as your teammates may see you. Adapt to the behavioral styles of the team members. And remember that being different can make you a valuable team member. While the sailing may not always be smooth, the progress will be invigorating!
What Our Clients Are Saying
“I especially liked the honesty of the workshop. It was a day well spent! I also enjoyed learning about the five rules of asking better questions.”
Jason Herndon, Chattanooga TN
In The News
TLC has been asked to speak/facilitate training in Istanbul, Turkey; Denver, Colorado; and several other places locally and nationally. We are always pleased to be asked to travel to you for training. Unfortunately, we cannot always accommodate requests with service dates that are close-at-hand. Please think at least three months in advance of your needs. Planning ahead enables us to say yes to your requests. Now is the time to contact us to schedule training that you would like in the fourth quarter of this year.
Team Time
One of the most frustrating things about working on a team can be the meetings. Teams often take more time to make decisions and accomplish tasks than individuals working alone. It's also no secret that an idea or proposal is sometimes sent to a committee for the purpose of killing it. So, what are the advantages of team meetings? How can they be made better?
The amount of time spent on group projects is not the primary advantage; it is the quality of the work. This is why our justice system, congress, and the Supreme Court are comprised of more than one person. The quality of the decisions made by bringing together a diversity of experience and expertise outweighs the time sacrifice of having several people working on the same task.
Did you know that research shows that the average talk time for a theme in a group meeting is only 58 seconds? This means that the attention span of groups is naturally short. Yet, team meetings often go off track. To keep team meetings on task, a few guidelines can be helpful.
- Use a facilitator with new or unproductive teams.
- Clarify roles and expectations up-front (e.g., leader, scribe, timekeeper, etc.).
- Clarify the specific purpose of the team. Also clarify what the successful result will be.
- Schedule start and stop times.
- Have a written agenda… and stick to it!
- Conduct some meetings standing up. They will not last as long as meetings with everyone sitting comfortably.
Training for effective team role-taking and task-orientation can be supplied in the context of staff and career development training. This is another excellent way to groom employees for more productive roles and outcomes. For suggestions regarding effective team building seminars and coaching, call TLC. We'd love to team up with you!
There is 'Me' in Teams!
Perhaps you have heard the expression, "there is no ‘I' in team."
The purpose of that saying is surely meant to have team members work
together rather than to have hidden agendas.
Following this pronoun path, there is no ‘we' in team either. While we
can hope that everyone will join in, in reality if we wait for that to
happen, the team may fail before it gets started.
There is a "me" in team. Maybe it is up to me to ensure the success of
the team. Maybe it is up to me to be prepared, arrive on time,
contribute, make decisions, follow through and encourage others to do
the same. If each team member realized it was his or her
responsibility, imagine what could be accomplished. Let it start with
me.
Bury the Hatchet
Vincent Ivan Phipps, B.S.
Remember the last time you and another person had a serious
disagreement? It is easy for me to recollect because my last argument
was so recent. I was traveling with my brother across the island of
Ibiza. The maps were in Spanish and, after arguing about the
directions, we ended up getting lost. My brother accused me of wasting
over two hours by fussing because I would not "bury the hatchet."
I took that opportunity to ask him if he knew the origin of the
expression he had just used. He admitted he didn't know (which was rare
because he hardly ever admits to NOT knowing something). I told him it
came from Native American ancestors. During an Indian battle, after the
fight was over, hatchets (small axes) would be buried in the dirt. This
symbolized that the fight was to be forgotten and peace should emerge.
My brother and I laughed and put our situation into perspective. Since
we only see each other two or three times a year, it was pretty silly
to use that precious vacation together arguing. Instead, we agreed to
listen to each other and get help from someone else. We found out we
were both wrong and that we were only twenty minutes from where we
wanted to go.
The next time you want to build a stronger team or improve rapport with
co-workers, learn to bury the hatchet. Focus on the goals ahead instead
of the problem's behind!
Birthdays Are For Everyone!
A very happy birthday to our clients whose birthdays are in July and August.
July:
Kathleen Stout
John Loving
Lloyd Carter
Derek Wood
Elaine Van Paepegham
Rachel Collum
Woody McClintock
Maureen Burke
Chan Phan
Charlie Milstead
James Nalley
Windy Niel
Daniel Homrich
Jennifer Humble
Kiran Naik
Paul Major
Steve Carr
Phil West
August:
Melinda Sublett
Danny Camp
Chris Mayo
Ven Garidepalli
Karen Whaley
John Stamps
Russell Martin
Tony Ray
Buck Gentry
Donna Wong
Jill Robertson
Randy Hamrick
Don Bates
Gordon Morehouse
Larcenuia Hills
Larry Samuels
Christopher Rownd
Jeff Miller
Carla Akhlaghi
Andrew Hunt
Kurt Emmenegger
Matthew Dobson
Charles Stiner
CEO Corner: "Tipping Point"
Beverly Inman-Ebel, MA CCC-SLP
Last May, I experienced the ultimate test of team building. I was in
Morocco attending a conference for the purpose of electing a leader.
Twenty-eight countries voted and the results were announced. My first
and second choices did not win. That was a long way to travel to be so
disappointed.
As the day progressed, evidence that the winner had used bribery,
threats, and tampering with the ballots came to my attention. My
disappointment turned into motivation to recall the election.
Leaders from ten countries met that evening to discuss what action to
take. Only half of the participants spoke English, so translators made
communication possible. Knowing that many smaller countries consider
Americans to be bossy and somewhat arrogant, I decided to listen first,
second, and third before I spoke.
This "team" only had one thing in common. We were all dissatisfied with
the election. Finding other common ground proved difficult. After a
half-hour of chaos that had me deep breathing to remain calm, a
solution was offered that was nothing more than a slap on the wrist. I
was convinced it would not work. I finally asked for clarity, "I am
willing to continue to listen. Please help me to understand how this
suggested action will solve the problem." They decided thirty minutes
later that it would not.
Another solution was offered, one that I considered less valuable than
the first. I asked for an explanation of the process they were
recommending. Once I heard that, I commented, "I am not convinced that
this process will allow us to accomplish our goal. What am I missing?"
Again, they decided this solution would not work.
Suddenly, an African delegate came into the meeting speaking rapid
French. Once the translators did their magic, all of us realized that
she had been threatened by the winner because she had voted for someone
else.
That was the tipping point and I could sense it by reading the emotion
on every face regardless of the language they were using to express it.
So, two hours into this meeting, I finally took the opportunity to
speak my mind. I announced that I had something to say and the volatile
room became instantly quiet. While some might say that these leaders
were willing to listen to the representative from the United States
because we are respected for our ability to get things accomplished or
because we are the most powerful country in the world, I think they
were willing to listen because I was willing to listen first.
This group of fifteen people from ten countries suddenly came together
with a united cause. We spent the rest of the evening composing a
letter, transcribing it into different languages, and burning the
midnight oil as each representative signed the finished document. We
came together as relative strangers and left as true friends that
continue to work together as a team through emails and international
meetings.
If you find yourself a member of a dysfunctional team, keep listening.
Look for the tipping point that can get the team together. Take the
risk of speaking up at the appropriate time, then allow everyone to buy
into the process so that it is the team's solution, not yours.
This group was able to function as a team in spite of language and
cultural barriers. So can your team. Listen. Share. Get involved. Live
your dreams!
Ask The Experts
Dear TLC,
There is a member of our team that seems to only point out the negative. Let's call him "Pessimistic Paul". Our department uses brainstorming to generate ideas. Paul will shoot down ideas quickly by yelling out, "That won't work!" or, "We tried that years ago and it failed then." He is stifling our creativity and bringing us all down. What should we do?
Stifled
Dear Stifled,
"Pessimistic Paul" sounds like a common member on the teams of many of our clients. Even though Paul's behavior is familiar, it can still be a challenge to have someone like this on your team.
Before your team's next brainstorm session, establish the ground rule that no comments or speaking are allowed until all ideas have been presented. Instead of singling out Paul, address this to the group in advance.
When Paul later blurts out during the discussion, "That won't work!," instead of getting defensive, get informative. State something like, "Thank you for your opinion Paul", and then ask open questions such as, "What information do you have to support what you think?" Remember a true team needs someone to find the weaknesses in a plan or process.
Featured Service: L.E.A.R.N. as a Team
When you stop learning, you stop growing. How many of our teams have stopped growing?
Just because you've worked around a group of people for a while does
not mean they know you, or that you know and understand them. TLC
focuses on teaching departments and teams the fundamentals of an
effective team by covering three basic principles.
- Understand the five roles associated with all teams:
- Liberator - generates the idea
- Energizer - advances the idea
- Analyzer - refines the idea
- Runner - implements the idea
- Navigator - coordinates everyone on the team
- Identify individual roles and recognize what your role is on the team.
- Understand how the process of an effective team is required to ensure maximum efficiency.
On August 19th, TLC will conduct a one-day course of how to L.E.A.R.N. as a Team. For additional information on how you or key members of your team can attend this workshop, please contact us at: 423-622-8255 or email tlc@talklisten.com. Seating is available but limited.
TLC establishes long-term relationships with our clients. If we have helped you or if you believe our approach to change would work for someone you know, please request a proposal or phone 1-888-232-2873. We work with individuals and groups on the following subject areas: attitude, listening, body language, voice, leadership, compliments and corrections, behavioral style, teamwork, effective meetings, public speaking, accent reduction and much more!.
All original materials in this newsletter are the copyrighted property of TLC, Talk Listen Communicate, LLC. For reprint information, please e-mail a request to tlc@talklisten.com.


